gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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