If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.