Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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