margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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