Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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