While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize