well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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