If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
