Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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