I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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