Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
