Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
