it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Randomize