I accidentally had phone sex last night
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Houston, we have a squirter
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
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