ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
