Texts From Last Night

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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....

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  (504): Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache (225): You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice (504): Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time? (225): I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz.... http://tfl.nu/t0ng
  Replies (4) Good night (1306) Bad night (565)
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  (949): View more from California

  "it" just moved

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  (949): "it" just moved http://tfl.nu/94mg
  Replies (10) Good night (582) Bad night (806) Order T-Shirt
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  (518): View more from New York

  Only a mothe r could love this liver

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  (518): Only a mothe r could love this liver http://tfl.nu/k0p5
  Replies (4) Good night (2243) Bad night (543) Order T-Shirt
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.

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  (815): I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value. http://tfl.nu/83po
  Replies (14) Good night (4563) Bad night (582) Order T-Shirt
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...

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  (602): she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot... http://tfl.nu/ac1u
  Replies (6) Good night (3005) Bad night (1099) Order T-Shirt
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  (971): View more from Oregon

  He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.

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  (971): He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex. http://tfl.nu/3zjj
  Replies (21) Good night (1700) Bad night (6359) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying

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  (917): I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying http://tfl.nu/unbu
  Replies (12) Good night (905) Bad night (6062) Order T-Shirt
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.

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  (615): I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us. http://tfl.nu/3t30
  Replies (24) Good night (7468) Bad night (869) Order T-Shirt
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?

  (1-218): View more from Minnesota

  Both?

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  (218): Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants? (1-218): Both? http://tfl.nu/yr9r
  Replies (21) Good night (9142) Bad night (929) Order T-Shirt
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.

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  (412): I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not. http://tfl.nu/jtsf
  Replies (14) Good night (7491) Bad night (747) Order T-Shirt
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?

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  (405): Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card? http://tfl.nu/2f9h
  Replies (8) Good night (1669) Bad night (846)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July

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  (609): Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July http://tfl.nu/khgw
  Replies (1) Good night (758) Bad night (370)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.

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  (541): A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell. http://tfl.nu/awme
  Replies (2) Good night (1084) Bad night (401) Order T-Shirt
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"

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  (612): Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here" http://tfl.nu/wz3j
  Replies (1) Good night (1125) Bad night (209)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die

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  (775): Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die http://tfl.nu/wat0
  Replies (2) Good night (386) Bad night (119) Order T-Shirt

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