ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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