return my video game
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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