you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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