Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Randomize
