hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
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