I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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