I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
