The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
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