"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Randomize
