hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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