Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Randomize
