I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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