sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Randomize
