Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize