think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize