it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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