Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
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I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
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I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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