just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
