how can u be prego again
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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