it's like iHOP with fire
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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