Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
