she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
He did a backflip because drugs
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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