Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
