I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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