You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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