alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
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