what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
