We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
kristin has been a bad kristin
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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