capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize