After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
