my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
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