and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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