Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Randomize
