All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize